I have counselled a number of mothers whose children have disappointed them in some way or another. Most of them have the same first response as Lysa TerKeurst : “And you know what I’m tempted to do as a mom? Draw a straight line from my child’s wrong choice to my weakness in mothering.”
If you’d like to know more of her thinking process about this, go here. It’s worth the read.
Witnesses to Hope 
This attitude isn’t necessarily the exclusive province of mothers. Fathers…at least this one…are acutely aware of the same feelings of failure and inadequacy. I am reminded of Danny Thomas’ monologues at the end of his shows, where he goes over what he should have done, how he should have behaved. And, I suspect that a lot of time I will spend in Purgatory will be like that as I climb the mountain, carrying all those bags of rocks until I learn to put them down at last, at long, long last.
Very, very good point, Peadar. Thank you for making it. I love the analogy of “carrying all those bags of rocks until I learn to put them down at last, at long, long last.” Amen.
You are very welcome, Sister. I had in mind both The Purgatorio and the film The Mission.
God bless you, and your work.
hits pretty close to home.
Have a diet coke. 😉