“The Holiday that could become All of our Days”

I am going to be out of town for Thanksgiving, but wanted to share this beautiful reflection for these days from Ann Voskamp:

The woman I meet up on the concourse, she tells me she was done.

Done with the man and the ring and the vows, done with the kids, done with her life.

Her eyes are so large and fragile, hands trembling, the way your world can quake and break and the aftershocks rattle you and the stunned retelling. I touch her shoulder.

And she crumbles in and heaves, and heaves that counting blessings made her see blessings and she’s staying and staying alive and barren places can break with bloom.

I memorize her face and glory.

We are the broken and the bruised and the messed up and the unmasked, women meeting at a conference, women of faith, and turning quiet to pull up sleeves and show scars.

A woman murmurs at my ear over the din that her brother in law ran over his 13 month old daughter, and we don’t have to say anything, and hands find each other and lace and this world is right busted and tied up with the strings of His broken and offered heart.

And a gravelly voice speaks of cancer and a grave and a child whose name she wears around her neck, and we finger that name together and fiercely believe in a Father who knows and holds and cups like relief, like a lung, when we can’t breathe.

And the story of a stroke and a mother and depression that pinned to a bed and the dark that suffocated for decades and the pen that wrote His gifts, that opened the veil to His light.

And I tuck a lock of hair behind the ear, and listen to unlockings and how women are finding keys.

And then she stepped close, a woman who couldn’t lift her head, who hid her eyes, and she says it timid near my shoulder.

“I had six children when I sinned.” And I turn, wrap an arm around her shoulder, draw her in.

I had an affair…” Her words snag and tear and I hold on to her as she starts to give way. “I got pregnant. And I couldn’t handle what I had done.”

I try to swallow, all my sins stuck and lodged and burning there in my throat. Oh, sister. The sobs wrack and we are two women caught in the act of living and sinning.

“And the day I was going for the abortion, a friend gave me this.” She nods her head towards that book with the nest on the cover.

“She gave it to me — and said what I couldn’t handle was actually a gift.” And I can hardly take this, have to look away, take my shoes off, tear my coat, beat my chest.

“And I read and I agreed with God and he is.”

And there on the screen of her phone –  she offers this picture of a smiling baby boy.

And I reach out and hold his smile and it is holy and it is epiphany and it is hard –

What you think you can’t handle — might actually be God handing you a gift.

You can read the rest here.

May you have a blessed Thanksgiving, full of true gratefulness for all the gifts in your life.

God of me

I post a poem every Sunday mostly for myself.  I love poetry–and always have–and I’m hoping someone out there does as well.  One of the reasons I love poetry is because it forces us more to the edges of heaven, to open our minds to the beauty and goodness and truth of God.

Small Song

God of the sky,
God of the sea,
God of the rock
and bird and tree,
you are also
the God of me.

The pebble fell.
The water stirred
and stilled again.
The hidden bird
made song for you.
His praise is heard.

You heard him sing
from in the tree.
And searching still
I know you’ll see
The love that wings
to you from me.

~Luci Shaw

Friday: from the archives

Sr. Dorcee, beloved's avatarWitnesses to Hope

A thought from Amy Carmichael on trusting that God loves us:

1 John 4.16 (Rotherham) We have come to understand and to trust the love which God hath in us.

I have been thinking much of this translation.  We can never fully understand that love, but we can begin to understand it even here and now, and as we understand, we trust.  This means that we trust all that the love of God does; all He gives, and all He does not give; all He says, and all He does not say.  To it all we say, by His loving enabling, I trust.  Let us be content with the Lord’s will, and tell Him so, and not disappoint Him by wishing for anything He does not give.  The more we understand His love, the more we trust.  (Edges of His Ways, p. 145)

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A Hymn

Timely . . .

O God of earth and altar,
Bow down and hear our cry,
Our earthly rulers falter,
Our people drift and die;
The walls of gold entomb us,
The swords of scorn divide,
Take not thy thunder from us,
But take away our pride.

From all that terror teaches,
From lies of tongue and pen,
From all the easy speeches
That comfort cruel men,
From sale and profanation
Of honour and the sword,
From sleep and from damnation,
Deliver us, good Lord.

Tie in a living tether
The prince and priest and thrall,
Bind all our lives together,
Smite us and save us all;
In ire and exultation
Aflame with faith, and free,
Lift up a living nation,
A single sword to thee.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton

Friday: from the archives

Sr. Dorcee, beloved's avatarWitnesses to Hope

In October I did a series of posts on “little words” in Scripture that are really “big” words.  I wanted to share another with you today.  

Psalm 73.26: But God

These words have been like strong hands lifting up, bearing up, countless thousands of souls. “My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.”  Many who will read this note are well and strong and joyful in their work, thank God for that.  Sooner or later, however, to most who follow the Crucified, there comes a time when flesh and heart fail, and if it were not for that “But God”, we should go under. . . .   (Amy Carmichael, Edges of His Ways, p. 12)

It’s evident to me what it means to have your flesh fail, but I have been pondering what it may mean to have your heart…

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